The Academy Awards will be on in a few hours. Everyone is prognosticating, keeping score, and making lists. I've no intention of watching it, unless of course my wife says something to the effect, "Honey you need to hurry in hear and see what (Salma, Penelope, Sofia etc.) is wearing.....I can't believe she isn't getting arrested for wearing something like that in public"
I have often thought about what my favorite movies are. I'll kick out a few titles and let it drop after a few minutes. Coming up with a straight up 'top ten' is impossible for me. The question was how to break it down. Certainly I could have done it by director. Certainly many of the great directors are repesented on my list. Instead I have opted to break it down by movie genre. I much prefer movies that defy easy classification as will become evident when I give reasons for why a particular movie is my favorite. Notable among the absences is fantasy and sword/sorcery type stuff. It's never been my cup of chowder.
The genre breakdown according to me is:
1) Romance
2) Dystopian future
3) War
4) Crime drama
5) Musical
6) Comedy
7)Action
8) Suspense
9) "Kid" movies
10) Western
Of course 'porn' could be an 11th category. They actually used to make movie versions of this stuff......when I was much, much younger. I'll just say it and be done with it. No explanations. 'Insatiable' with Marilyn Chambers. Based on the strength of that movie alone, I voted for her as vice-president in 2004.
I will take these in reverse order.
Western: 'Silverado'.
Memorable characters with unique motivations. It is well scripted especially in how the stories begin to intertwine and eventually collide.
Runner-up: 'Mister Majestyk'. Cliche' ridden, but the truck chase and unsuing final shootout still makes me smile.
"Kid" movies: 'Babe'
This talking pig forever ingrained in me that kindness and unconditional love can transform the lives of people......and animals.
Runner-up: Toy Story III. Admit it, you got misty eyed-when they were all headed for the incinerator. The miracle is Pixar bringing 'life' to the characters.
Suspense: No Country for Old Men.
At the heart of every good suspense movie is a bad guy. Anton Chiggurh was a really, really bad dude. Truly ruthless.
Runner-up: The Usual Suspects. A genuine 'surpise' ending. Well scripted (but needlessly heavy on the profanity) and another delicious bad guy in the form of Kayser Soza
Action: Aliens
Space critters, valiant Marines, and Sigourney Weaver alternating between nurturing and kicking ass.........wearing a wife-beater!
Runner-up: Kung Fu Hustle. It combines elements of romance, redemption, and loyalty, which I enjoy in movies. It combines camp and drama with a dash of Taoism stirred in.
Comedy: There's Something about Mary.
Several instances of comedy gold in this one. The entire cast got in on the laughs, not just one or two people. It was raunchy and sweet.
Runner-up: Dirty Rotten Scoundrels
All the same reasons listed above, plus Glenn Headly actually spun me into her web. Sweet, just not too raunchy.
Musical: Little Shop of Horrors
OK....it's Broadway. Ellen Greene absolutely owned the role of Audrey. It alternated humor with horror pretty well also.
Runner-up: Rocky Horror Picture Show. A play brought to the screen. It has to be seen live of course.
Crime Drama: Godfather 1 and 2
It was one book, therefore I consider it one epic movie in two parts. It is a master class in movie making. Amost as quoatble as the Big Lebowski.......almost.
Runner-up: Lock, Stock, and two smoking barrels. Yup, Guy Ritchie was making movies before 'Sherlock Holmes'. It's all about characters and intertwining story lines.
War: Full Metal Jacket
I saw this one the day after I got back from OCS. The first half of the movie seemed like a comedy to me. Mainly because it was happening to some other guy. While I've not experienced combat, I am told that it was true to life. There's no overt 'broader message' just guys trying to survive and make sense of absurdity.
Runner-up: Platoon. Again it's all about characters. How much was I moved by this movie? One of my sons is named 'Elias' after Willem Dafoe's character.
Dystopian Future: The Matrix. Easily one of the most influential movies ever. The special effects were the things that were copied. The original idea, good script, and characters is what made this movie great.
Runner-up: AI. That's two Kubrick movies if you're counting and not the two that are considered his greatest. The question of what is living and what is not is an easier one to answer. What makes an enduring soul is difficult to answer. On an emotional lever I have never been moved so much and for so long as this one.
Romance: I am going to do the Runner-up first, the English Patient. I enjoy separate stories that are woven together. It is from a time and place that I have studied extensively, but this movie brought it to life. Well written, well acted, had the guts to have a bitter ending.
My favorite? Same era as the above, just the other end of the continent. Specifically Morocco. It is a movie of sacrifice, heartbreak, weariness, intrigue, and betrayal. Redemption, through taking a stand and doing what is best for others, is a theme that I've always had an affinity for. In sacrificing ourselves, we can change the tide. We also reclaim eternal our soul. That is why Casablanca will likely be my favorite movie forever.
Sunday, February 26, 2012
Thursday, January 26, 2012
alchemy
When one hears the word 'alchemy' the first thing that comes to mind is turning lead into gold. It can be done actually. If you take thin lead sheets and bombard them with some type of nucleus in an accelerator......ask the folks at CERN. I am sure they can tell exactly how it can be done. A broader definition of alchemy is turning dross, or something undesirable, into something desirable. If turning lead into gold were easily done, then two things would occur. First, the price of lead would immediately jump at the same time that gold would plummet Eventually the two would be very close to each other and both would continue to drop in value until they begin to approach the historic prices of lead. In the end, nobody wins.
There is such a thing as modern alchemy however. It is cooking. The end products are perishable and are intended to eventually to be turned back into dross. The most striking example of my point is carmelized onions. I hate raw onions. Oooooh, I almost forgot. I used the word 'hate' in this blog which means the search engine at my employer will block my blog. Anyway, I hate raw onions.
There have been many instances in my life where I expressed my disdain for them. My family, friends, and coworkers all could swap amusing anecdotes. There are things that can be done to the lowly onion that improve it's palatablity. The first is mincing. At Mickey D's the burgers have onion on them that is bordering on pureed. I am not sure exactly why, but for me this makes the onion edible. The second is pickling. Most pickled onions are still undesirable for me but there have been a few exceptions. Namely, the Vidalia onion relish at Pirate O's. I wouldn't be able to polish off a jar of this stuff, but mixed with cheese etc. it is good. The same can be said of the pickled onions with the smoked salmon flatbread at Epic. The high holy of onion alchemy is still the carmelized onion. Combine diced sweet onions with olive oil, and a bit of soy sauce. Reduce it down for close to an hours, stirring frequently, and browning it to the point where it is flirting with charring.......Lord have mercy. There is about two ounces of it in our fridge. If I thought I could get away with it, I'd eat it all.
There are other foods than can be converted from personally inedible into something exquisite. The raw potato. The raw tomato. Zucchini. Cranber.......nah they are just nasty no matter what.
There is such a thing as modern alchemy however. It is cooking. The end products are perishable and are intended to eventually to be turned back into dross. The most striking example of my point is carmelized onions. I hate raw onions. Oooooh, I almost forgot. I used the word 'hate' in this blog which means the search engine at my employer will block my blog. Anyway, I hate raw onions.
There have been many instances in my life where I expressed my disdain for them. My family, friends, and coworkers all could swap amusing anecdotes. There are things that can be done to the lowly onion that improve it's palatablity. The first is mincing. At Mickey D's the burgers have onion on them that is bordering on pureed. I am not sure exactly why, but for me this makes the onion edible. The second is pickling. Most pickled onions are still undesirable for me but there have been a few exceptions. Namely, the Vidalia onion relish at Pirate O's. I wouldn't be able to polish off a jar of this stuff, but mixed with cheese etc. it is good. The same can be said of the pickled onions with the smoked salmon flatbread at Epic. The high holy of onion alchemy is still the carmelized onion. Combine diced sweet onions with olive oil, and a bit of soy sauce. Reduce it down for close to an hours, stirring frequently, and browning it to the point where it is flirting with charring.......Lord have mercy. There is about two ounces of it in our fridge. If I thought I could get away with it, I'd eat it all.
There are other foods than can be converted from personally inedible into something exquisite. The raw potato. The raw tomato. Zucchini. Cranber.......nah they are just nasty no matter what.
Monday, December 12, 2011
rumors, the pursuit of perfection, and errata
I have always felt it best to deal with rumor and accusation head-on. People that speak ill of me are free to have their opinions. For example, the can say, "I think John is full of bullshit". That is an opinion and one that I would occasionally have to second. When someone says, "John is lying, or John is wrong", that really pisses me off........when I am telling the truth and right anyway. Words like 'lying' and 'wrong' are statements of facts. With that having been said, let me address a rumor concerning me that has been making the rounds. Specifically regarding something that I do for just a few hours once a week.
It is has been said that I wear items that are made of leather, rubber, and are laced up to keep things in place. These statements are true. I think it is worth noting that it is usually for just a few hours at a time and typically just once a week. Sometimes I will do it twice a week, sometimes I have gone two weeks at a time. The point is I do it consistently and unashamedly. Usually it is at church. It's true....I admit it......I wear nice shoes! Johnston Murphy's. My oxblood shoes are 16.5 years old. All of this is fact.
I have spoken many times about food and what I like. A hallmark of my favorite restaurants is a signature dish. One place I enjoy is Maddox. It is a destination restaurant to be certain. What is their signature dish? Turkey steak? Fried chicken? Steaks? Maybe all of them. What makes them good not intricacy of flavors, it is not complex techniques, it is not elegant presentation. What they do is make simple things perfectly. Let me illustrate my point by describing my last meal there. The water and ice are from their own well. It is clean, crisp, and in old-school glasses. The butter and rolls are next. The butter is soft, but not squishy, and easily speardable without tearing up the roll. Simple, but perfect. The rolls and corn pones are from a few simple ingredients but precisely mixed, baked, and served perfectly warm. Simple but perfect. Next is the seafood salad. It is artificialy crab meat over a bed of shredded lettuce topped with cocktail sauce. Strangely it works. It sounds vile, but it works and I eat it all every time. Yes I like the turkey steaks. They are unique but, let's face it, the emperor is wearing no clothes. The fried chicken is skinless which is fairly unique but hardly original. This makes the thighs edible, but it is otherwise......just OK. Many who would hear me say this would get angry. I would earnestly suggest they eat a turkey steak and shut up while I state the obvious. Maddox is all about steak. The tenderloin I had was large, properly aged and seared, and fell apart while I was cutting it. The dry rub and pat of butter work perfectly. It was medium rare, instead of the rare that I ordered. Otherwise simple but perfect.
Finally I am watching a debate between Huntsman and Gingrich. Gingrich is smart to be certain, well-connected....still, and understands history and the complexities. Huntsman is transcendent. I have always thought he is a politicaly thoroughbred and today people are seeing it. He will win.
One more thing, I am still kicking around running for Senate. Hatch is a moron and I doubt the Dems got anyone to consider.
It is has been said that I wear items that are made of leather, rubber, and are laced up to keep things in place. These statements are true. I think it is worth noting that it is usually for just a few hours at a time and typically just once a week. Sometimes I will do it twice a week, sometimes I have gone two weeks at a time. The point is I do it consistently and unashamedly. Usually it is at church. It's true....I admit it......I wear nice shoes! Johnston Murphy's. My oxblood shoes are 16.5 years old. All of this is fact.
I have spoken many times about food and what I like. A hallmark of my favorite restaurants is a signature dish. One place I enjoy is Maddox. It is a destination restaurant to be certain. What is their signature dish? Turkey steak? Fried chicken? Steaks? Maybe all of them. What makes them good not intricacy of flavors, it is not complex techniques, it is not elegant presentation. What they do is make simple things perfectly. Let me illustrate my point by describing my last meal there. The water and ice are from their own well. It is clean, crisp, and in old-school glasses. The butter and rolls are next. The butter is soft, but not squishy, and easily speardable without tearing up the roll. Simple, but perfect. The rolls and corn pones are from a few simple ingredients but precisely mixed, baked, and served perfectly warm. Simple but perfect. Next is the seafood salad. It is artificialy crab meat over a bed of shredded lettuce topped with cocktail sauce. Strangely it works. It sounds vile, but it works and I eat it all every time. Yes I like the turkey steaks. They are unique but, let's face it, the emperor is wearing no clothes. The fried chicken is skinless which is fairly unique but hardly original. This makes the thighs edible, but it is otherwise......just OK. Many who would hear me say this would get angry. I would earnestly suggest they eat a turkey steak and shut up while I state the obvious. Maddox is all about steak. The tenderloin I had was large, properly aged and seared, and fell apart while I was cutting it. The dry rub and pat of butter work perfectly. It was medium rare, instead of the rare that I ordered. Otherwise simple but perfect.
Finally I am watching a debate between Huntsman and Gingrich. Gingrich is smart to be certain, well-connected....still, and understands history and the complexities. Huntsman is transcendent. I have always thought he is a politicaly thoroughbred and today people are seeing it. He will win.
One more thing, I am still kicking around running for Senate. Hatch is a moron and I doubt the Dems got anyone to consider.
Monday, September 19, 2011
talking like a pirate , "Taco Nation", and machisimo
Today is my son's birthday. That meant he got to pick what he wanted for dinner and what kind of cake he wanted. More on that later.
Today is also 'Talk like a Pirate Day". I didn't. I suspect most pirates were, like most criminals, ill-educated and not terribly bright. Given my love for the Mother Tongue, I would likely be disgusted. Though I am not sure of the exact link, today is a day of celebrating the Flying Spaghetti Monster. May you all be touched by his noodly appendage.
Sometime in the last millenia salsa consumption surpassed catsup in this country. La reconquista is alive and well. I welcome it. The plight of the illegal immigrant is something I have discussed before. But La Reconquista is not about Mexico taking over. Quite the contrary in fact. The illegals come here because Mexico sucks. The U.S. rocks. What's so bad about assimilating a little Mexican culture? There is a weekly article entitled, "Ask a Mexican" that is the only reason I read a certain newspaper. He is writing a book entitled 'Taco Nation' wherein he discusses the encroachment of Mexican food into the American pallate.
Back to my kid's birthday. What did we want? We had ranchera preparada, abodobo chicken, with tortillas, and a tres leches cake. Was it Mexican night? Nope. He just got his favorites. For him the war is over. Can Spanglish be far off? Nope, we are already doing it. At least me. The cake had strawberries and fresh peaches, cream, condensed milk, and cake moistened with evaporated milk. There is only one cake that has ever been sweeter. That would be the cake I had a few years ago with a picture of Salma Hayek on it. Son number three ate the boobs before I got to them.
I have never been much of a 'competitor'. I played a little baseball as a kid. Growing up you could usually find me in a pick-up game of flag football or playing three on three. I played a little Church basketball and softball until I became disgusted with the lack of sportsmanship. In short, I like to play with the fellas and have some fun. No more. I live in a small house, I own nothing ostentatious or flashy. I don't have a boat. I don't have a sports car. I dress and act like an old guy and don't try to be one of my kids. I am a Taoist.
I do however like to be a hospitable host whenever possible. I always try to pick up the tab when I eat out with friends. When we eat out as a family we typically have a few extra 'Loertschers' with us. When it's dinnertime anybody is who is the house eats. All of this is nothing more than straight up 'quien es mas macho?'.
The Ybarras were my neighbors for the first 24 years of my life. I barely remember Senora Ybarra other than she was kind to me and bought we a sombrero that I wore everywhere as a child. I lover her for it. Her boys, Fred, Albert, and Carlos would throw neighborhood parties where everyone was invited. After all if everyone is there, nobody calls the cops! They would have the lights strung out. Music, sometimes live. Lots of wonderful food. Plenty of places to sit and socialize. FInally, a large area where I could throw a football around with their nephews Jose and Oscar. Even today, I cannot recall having attended better parties. When I was about 10 I remember leaving a party at midnight and going to my home next door. My parents promised they would be home in just a few minutes. For whatever the reason, I woke up about two hours later and the Ybarras were still going strong. I tried yelling for everybody to shut up and go to sleep. One of the neighborhood cops (who was at the party) pointed at me as he said something to my father. The old-man shrugged and then waved at me as if to say, 'you're bothering me kid'.
Fred poured me a beer when I was eight. I got through about half of it. My parents caught me nursing it. My mom seemed entirely non-plussed and promptly went back to chatting with the women. My old man asked, "Does it taste like shit?". I said it did. He explained that it wouldn't be impolite to not finish it. So I dumped it. Dad wandered off to grab some more tamales and lay down on the grass. I washed the taste out with some chile verde and Coke with real sugar and I was right as rain.
I blame the Ybarras for what I have become. I am nothing more than a middle-aged Mexican who suffers from an overdose of machisimo. What's next? Always wearing shirts that are impossibly white? A massive rose garden in the front yard? Growing my hair out in order that I can keep it impeccably combed? I'll have none of that. Still, La reconquista is over for me. I lost the battle by the mid-70's.
Today is also 'Talk like a Pirate Day". I didn't. I suspect most pirates were, like most criminals, ill-educated and not terribly bright. Given my love for the Mother Tongue, I would likely be disgusted. Though I am not sure of the exact link, today is a day of celebrating the Flying Spaghetti Monster. May you all be touched by his noodly appendage.
Sometime in the last millenia salsa consumption surpassed catsup in this country. La reconquista is alive and well. I welcome it. The plight of the illegal immigrant is something I have discussed before. But La Reconquista is not about Mexico taking over. Quite the contrary in fact. The illegals come here because Mexico sucks. The U.S. rocks. What's so bad about assimilating a little Mexican culture? There is a weekly article entitled, "Ask a Mexican" that is the only reason I read a certain newspaper. He is writing a book entitled 'Taco Nation' wherein he discusses the encroachment of Mexican food into the American pallate.
Back to my kid's birthday. What did we want? We had ranchera preparada, abodobo chicken, with tortillas, and a tres leches cake. Was it Mexican night? Nope. He just got his favorites. For him the war is over. Can Spanglish be far off? Nope, we are already doing it. At least me. The cake had strawberries and fresh peaches, cream, condensed milk, and cake moistened with evaporated milk. There is only one cake that has ever been sweeter. That would be the cake I had a few years ago with a picture of Salma Hayek on it. Son number three ate the boobs before I got to them.
I have never been much of a 'competitor'. I played a little baseball as a kid. Growing up you could usually find me in a pick-up game of flag football or playing three on three. I played a little Church basketball and softball until I became disgusted with the lack of sportsmanship. In short, I like to play with the fellas and have some fun. No more. I live in a small house, I own nothing ostentatious or flashy. I don't have a boat. I don't have a sports car. I dress and act like an old guy and don't try to be one of my kids. I am a Taoist.
I do however like to be a hospitable host whenever possible. I always try to pick up the tab when I eat out with friends. When we eat out as a family we typically have a few extra 'Loertschers' with us. When it's dinnertime anybody is who is the house eats. All of this is nothing more than straight up 'quien es mas macho?'.
The Ybarras were my neighbors for the first 24 years of my life. I barely remember Senora Ybarra other than she was kind to me and bought we a sombrero that I wore everywhere as a child. I lover her for it. Her boys, Fred, Albert, and Carlos would throw neighborhood parties where everyone was invited. After all if everyone is there, nobody calls the cops! They would have the lights strung out. Music, sometimes live. Lots of wonderful food. Plenty of places to sit and socialize. FInally, a large area where I could throw a football around with their nephews Jose and Oscar. Even today, I cannot recall having attended better parties. When I was about 10 I remember leaving a party at midnight and going to my home next door. My parents promised they would be home in just a few minutes. For whatever the reason, I woke up about two hours later and the Ybarras were still going strong. I tried yelling for everybody to shut up and go to sleep. One of the neighborhood cops (who was at the party) pointed at me as he said something to my father. The old-man shrugged and then waved at me as if to say, 'you're bothering me kid'.
Fred poured me a beer when I was eight. I got through about half of it. My parents caught me nursing it. My mom seemed entirely non-plussed and promptly went back to chatting with the women. My old man asked, "Does it taste like shit?". I said it did. He explained that it wouldn't be impolite to not finish it. So I dumped it. Dad wandered off to grab some more tamales and lay down on the grass. I washed the taste out with some chile verde and Coke with real sugar and I was right as rain.
I blame the Ybarras for what I have become. I am nothing more than a middle-aged Mexican who suffers from an overdose of machisimo. What's next? Always wearing shirts that are impossibly white? A massive rose garden in the front yard? Growing my hair out in order that I can keep it impeccably combed? I'll have none of that. Still, La reconquista is over for me. I lost the battle by the mid-70's.
Thursday, August 18, 2011
I resolve to post more often.
I got a quick email from one of my gentle readers (and fellow Pharmacy manager who was mentioned in a previous blog becuase he wears men's underwear) informing me that my blog is blocked from view by my employer. I can come up with several good reasons for it to be blocked. 1) We aren't getting paid to waste time reading my drivel. 2) Well........the first reason alone is sufficient.
It's not so much the why that gave me pause to thing but rather the how. Apparently I used the word 'hate' somewhere in there. So I thought this might be a good time for me to discuss words. Anyone who knows me can attest that I enjoy this. I am troubled when I hear people say that two words means 'the same thing'. Naturally this is not true, otherwise we would just have one word.
So I wish to pontificate on dislike vs. hate. 'Pontificate' is a nice word. It reminds me of a Little Rascals joke I know. Naturally, Buckwheat delivers the punchline. Before I do that I wish to separate out love and hate from the mix. I do not believe these are end points for a spectrum of opinion, rather they are two different sides of the same emotionally governed coin. There is a fine line between love and hate and when the conversion occurs they are usually of the same magnitude. Think mathematics. The absolute value of negative six is six. Examples could be: The person who I have loved for a long time who betrays me is now my worst enemy. A long time adversary makes a magnaminous gesture and is now my best buddy in the world.
Like and dislike lack an emotional component. Think about the girl in college who said the she really 'liked' you. Just in case you didn't know already, that means that there was absolutely no chance she would have ever had sex with you. It's far easier to bone the ones that 'hate' you since their is a built-in emotional component that is at least present. And, if my analysis is correct, can be converted into something that makes 'make-up sex' seem like going to the prom with your sister.
Finally I am about to make my point. We have like on one end and dislike on the other. Ultimately nobody cares what we like and dislike, unless of course they love or hate them. When there is no emotional component, people don't care as much. Hence people will result to hyperbole to make their views known. I should probably go back and see where I have used the word 'hate'. I am lazy though, so I will just start a fresh list. I will naturally not list individuals. Why, because there are no individuals that I hate. There are certain groups that I hate, but mostly there are acts and attitudes that I hate. Alas, many individuals do them on occasional. So without further ado:
Uncle John's top-ten list of hated things
1) White supremacists. The thing that I find most laughable about this group is their parareligious admiration for Hitler. Let's turn back the clock to post-Weimar Germany. You are a tattooed and pierced person with a lengthy record of criminal mischief and drug-dealing. You are going to be one of the first that is 'culled' from the tribe.
The truth is I hate any group that preaches hate. I am merely reflecting back at them what they project out. Most of these kids (yes I used the word 'kids' since they are typically young and stupid) are just pissed off about some type of perceived injustice. Many of them have probably been screwed over at one point. As crime statistics overwhelmingly bear out, you were most likely screwed over by somebody of the same race. Once they figure this out, then I don't hate them any more.
2) Political extremists. This is not to say that I hate those with extreme views. Quite the contrary in fact since I have some pretty extreme ones myself. What I hate is those who vilify anyone who has a contrary position. Consider the immigration issue. There are those who think that all illegal immigrants should be deported, after all 'what part of illegal don't you understand'. Then there are those who think that they all immigrants are just here seeking a better life, should be embraced, and anybody who expresses concerns about any of them are bigoted and uncaring. I hate them both. However, from a factual standpoint the latter is slightly less full of shit I suppose. That don't mean I hate them any less.
3) Raw tomatoes
4) People that exploit suffering or fear for financial gain or to secure power. I'm not talking about morticians, or even ambulance chasing attorneys. I did however say that I would not list individuals. My old man told me, "Son, no matter how shitty things get, somebody always benefits from the status quo". These are the people that I hate.
5) Francophiles. Give it up.......English won!
6) Filet Mignon (say, isn't that a French phrase?), or any other decent cut of beef, that is 'well done'.
7) Caesar's Palace.
8) Golf.
9) Pico de Gallo.
10) Greasy, spamming, malware-spewing, robo-calling, denizens of the cyber universe. I would consider hell as a viable option if I am able to administer your daily pineapple (think "Little Nicky").
It's not so much the why that gave me pause to thing but rather the how. Apparently I used the word 'hate' somewhere in there. So I thought this might be a good time for me to discuss words. Anyone who knows me can attest that I enjoy this. I am troubled when I hear people say that two words means 'the same thing'. Naturally this is not true, otherwise we would just have one word.
So I wish to pontificate on dislike vs. hate. 'Pontificate' is a nice word. It reminds me of a Little Rascals joke I know. Naturally, Buckwheat delivers the punchline. Before I do that I wish to separate out love and hate from the mix. I do not believe these are end points for a spectrum of opinion, rather they are two different sides of the same emotionally governed coin. There is a fine line between love and hate and when the conversion occurs they are usually of the same magnitude. Think mathematics. The absolute value of negative six is six. Examples could be: The person who I have loved for a long time who betrays me is now my worst enemy. A long time adversary makes a magnaminous gesture and is now my best buddy in the world.
Like and dislike lack an emotional component. Think about the girl in college who said the she really 'liked' you. Just in case you didn't know already, that means that there was absolutely no chance she would have ever had sex with you. It's far easier to bone the ones that 'hate' you since their is a built-in emotional component that is at least present. And, if my analysis is correct, can be converted into something that makes 'make-up sex' seem like going to the prom with your sister.
Finally I am about to make my point. We have like on one end and dislike on the other. Ultimately nobody cares what we like and dislike, unless of course they love or hate them. When there is no emotional component, people don't care as much. Hence people will result to hyperbole to make their views known. I should probably go back and see where I have used the word 'hate'. I am lazy though, so I will just start a fresh list. I will naturally not list individuals. Why, because there are no individuals that I hate. There are certain groups that I hate, but mostly there are acts and attitudes that I hate. Alas, many individuals do them on occasional. So without further ado:
Uncle John's top-ten list of hated things
1) White supremacists. The thing that I find most laughable about this group is their parareligious admiration for Hitler. Let's turn back the clock to post-Weimar Germany. You are a tattooed and pierced person with a lengthy record of criminal mischief and drug-dealing. You are going to be one of the first that is 'culled' from the tribe.
The truth is I hate any group that preaches hate. I am merely reflecting back at them what they project out. Most of these kids (yes I used the word 'kids' since they are typically young and stupid) are just pissed off about some type of perceived injustice. Many of them have probably been screwed over at one point. As crime statistics overwhelmingly bear out, you were most likely screwed over by somebody of the same race. Once they figure this out, then I don't hate them any more.
2) Political extremists. This is not to say that I hate those with extreme views. Quite the contrary in fact since I have some pretty extreme ones myself. What I hate is those who vilify anyone who has a contrary position. Consider the immigration issue. There are those who think that all illegal immigrants should be deported, after all 'what part of illegal don't you understand'. Then there are those who think that they all immigrants are just here seeking a better life, should be embraced, and anybody who expresses concerns about any of them are bigoted and uncaring. I hate them both. However, from a factual standpoint the latter is slightly less full of shit I suppose. That don't mean I hate them any less.
3) Raw tomatoes
4) People that exploit suffering or fear for financial gain or to secure power. I'm not talking about morticians, or even ambulance chasing attorneys. I did however say that I would not list individuals. My old man told me, "Son, no matter how shitty things get, somebody always benefits from the status quo". These are the people that I hate.
5) Francophiles. Give it up.......English won!
6) Filet Mignon (say, isn't that a French phrase?), or any other decent cut of beef, that is 'well done'.
7) Caesar's Palace.
8) Golf.
9) Pico de Gallo.
10) Greasy, spamming, malware-spewing, robo-calling, denizens of the cyber universe. I would consider hell as a viable option if I am able to administer your daily pineapple (think "Little Nicky").
Tuesday, June 21, 2011
President Huntsman
I'll make this brief. Back in the day when Jon Huntsman was elected as Governor, I distinctly remember commenting that this guy had the proper mix of smarts, business and governmental savvy, centrist thinking and governing style, and a smokin' hot wife. In short,l he is a political thoroughbred.
I am saying right now that he will win the Republican nomination and defeat Obama. He will also be the only Republican presidential candidate I have voted for aside from Reagan in 1984.
I will produce this in about 16 months and look like a freaking genius if he wins. If he doesn't I will be able to correctly say, 'what a shame he didn't'.
I am saying right now that he will win the Republican nomination and defeat Obama. He will also be the only Republican presidential candidate I have voted for aside from Reagan in 1984.
I will produce this in about 16 months and look like a freaking genius if he wins. If he doesn't I will be able to correctly say, 'what a shame he didn't'.
Wednesday, June 1, 2011
"Perfect" things, Rocky Horror, and high school graduation
There are few perfect things in this world. Many beautiful things, but few that are transcendent. Beautiful things have flaws, perfection is transcendent. The only perfect things I know are firmly rooted in the religious realm. Much of the spiritual, or mystic, realm is flawed. Things that move me emotionally are frequently flawed, but they are moving nonetheless.
Whew......that was all cryptic enough. What's my point? Let me tell you some things that move me. A perfectly ripe peach, the Brandenburg concertos and Beethoven's 9th, a solitary soak at DFHS on a stormy day, warm sand underfoot, having my buddy Jay roll two straight 'ones' when attempting to take Bucharest at 2:1 odds. My transcendent moments I share only with those who are very close to me. I did have a moment after I climbed Lone Peak that involved a cold beer and a hot shower that was pretty close to transcendent though.
Towards the end of Rocky Horror, Frank 'n furter sings about the need to do wild stuff when you're young in order that you'll have memories that will last a lifetime. I've done a lot of crazy stuff in my life. Most of it recalled in a non-specific sense and a neutral judgement. Some things I regret. Most of what I regret was things I said, not actions. There are a lot of things I've done that I'm not proud of, but few that I've regretted. In fact, many of these things I still recall with fondness. I've no desire to repeat nor revisit these things, but I've no regrets.
FInally I went to son number two's high school graduation. It is indeed a microcosm of those things in high school that were good and bad. It all started a few weeks ago. There are always a number of kids that are not going to graduate. They, or typically their parents, demand that some last-minute make-up assignment be given so they can graduate. Graduating high-school is a joke. Basically all you need to do is show up and make even a half-assed attempt to do the work. Alas, many cannot even do that yet they feel entitled. We were sent out a number of rules for the graduation ceremony. NO RUNNING, NO JUMPING, NO SKIPPING, and most important of all NO HORSEPLAY! Well not exactly, but people still wear leis, do the fist and arm pumping, have their numbskull posses scream from the peanut gallery, and wear hot pink tennis shoes so they can 'be comfortable' which is just their bullshit excuse for thinking they are cool. I'm going to advise son number three to do a few things when he graduates next year. First wear some ugly ass fluorescent shoes that 'light up' when you step on them. Second I will weigh him down with leis. Third, I will scream, hoot, and holler for 30 seconds in an attempt to drown out the names of as many kids as possible. After all, they aren't important, just MY kid. At least this is the view of the assholes that ruin graduation every year by thinking they are the exception.
Some would say I am picking on 'polys'. I suppose that is a fair critique. Personally, I love the idea of leis. I think the prohibition on leis at graduation is a bad rule. Nonetheless it is a rule, so it should be obeyed. If they wish to challenge it then let me know. I will show up and fight for leis. Let me tell you what breaks my heart about the poly graduates. The girls are virtually ignored, and the boys inevitably self-identify as football players. It is a tragedy that aside from athletics and student government they rarely distinguish themselves. And this type of attitude is by no means relegated to polys, but I find it the hardest to accept. Islanders have a proud history of sacrifice for an ideal. They are a innately peaceful people, but have a strong warrior ethos infuses in them. Consider the long odds their ancestors faced in coming, yet they did it anyway. And what is the result? Ask yourself how many poly professionals or military do you know? These are the people that should be emulated, not the football punk-asses that are already forgotten.
Finally, I noticed a particluar trend in female summer fashions today. It consists of baby doll type dresses that only reach down to the mid-thigh. I suppose if there were just one or two girls wearing this ensemble (and who had toned calves and thighs) they could have really rocked it. When seemingly every other girl is wearing this, it becomes mundane and hence ugly. Being unique is the way to get noticed. Take a lesson for someone's mom who wore a form fitting tan, knee-length, skirt, with a white men's dress shirt, and some understated sandals. Mmmmmm........now if I can just talk my wife into wearing that!
Whew......that was all cryptic enough. What's my point? Let me tell you some things that move me. A perfectly ripe peach, the Brandenburg concertos and Beethoven's 9th, a solitary soak at DFHS on a stormy day, warm sand underfoot, having my buddy Jay roll two straight 'ones' when attempting to take Bucharest at 2:1 odds. My transcendent moments I share only with those who are very close to me. I did have a moment after I climbed Lone Peak that involved a cold beer and a hot shower that was pretty close to transcendent though.
Towards the end of Rocky Horror, Frank 'n furter sings about the need to do wild stuff when you're young in order that you'll have memories that will last a lifetime. I've done a lot of crazy stuff in my life. Most of it recalled in a non-specific sense and a neutral judgement. Some things I regret. Most of what I regret was things I said, not actions. There are a lot of things I've done that I'm not proud of, but few that I've regretted. In fact, many of these things I still recall with fondness. I've no desire to repeat nor revisit these things, but I've no regrets.
FInally I went to son number two's high school graduation. It is indeed a microcosm of those things in high school that were good and bad. It all started a few weeks ago. There are always a number of kids that are not going to graduate. They, or typically their parents, demand that some last-minute make-up assignment be given so they can graduate. Graduating high-school is a joke. Basically all you need to do is show up and make even a half-assed attempt to do the work. Alas, many cannot even do that yet they feel entitled. We were sent out a number of rules for the graduation ceremony. NO RUNNING, NO JUMPING, NO SKIPPING, and most important of all NO HORSEPLAY! Well not exactly, but people still wear leis, do the fist and arm pumping, have their numbskull posses scream from the peanut gallery, and wear hot pink tennis shoes so they can 'be comfortable' which is just their bullshit excuse for thinking they are cool. I'm going to advise son number three to do a few things when he graduates next year. First wear some ugly ass fluorescent shoes that 'light up' when you step on them. Second I will weigh him down with leis. Third, I will scream, hoot, and holler for 30 seconds in an attempt to drown out the names of as many kids as possible. After all, they aren't important, just MY kid. At least this is the view of the assholes that ruin graduation every year by thinking they are the exception.
Some would say I am picking on 'polys'. I suppose that is a fair critique. Personally, I love the idea of leis. I think the prohibition on leis at graduation is a bad rule. Nonetheless it is a rule, so it should be obeyed. If they wish to challenge it then let me know. I will show up and fight for leis. Let me tell you what breaks my heart about the poly graduates. The girls are virtually ignored, and the boys inevitably self-identify as football players. It is a tragedy that aside from athletics and student government they rarely distinguish themselves. And this type of attitude is by no means relegated to polys, but I find it the hardest to accept. Islanders have a proud history of sacrifice for an ideal. They are a innately peaceful people, but have a strong warrior ethos infuses in them. Consider the long odds their ancestors faced in coming, yet they did it anyway. And what is the result? Ask yourself how many poly professionals or military do you know? These are the people that should be emulated, not the football punk-asses that are already forgotten.
Finally, I noticed a particluar trend in female summer fashions today. It consists of baby doll type dresses that only reach down to the mid-thigh. I suppose if there were just one or two girls wearing this ensemble (and who had toned calves and thighs) they could have really rocked it. When seemingly every other girl is wearing this, it becomes mundane and hence ugly. Being unique is the way to get noticed. Take a lesson for someone's mom who wore a form fitting tan, knee-length, skirt, with a white men's dress shirt, and some understated sandals. Mmmmmm........now if I can just talk my wife into wearing that!
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