Wednesday, July 22, 2009

back to traditional values

Not only am I not posting frequently enough, I feel as if I have drifted away from what this blog should be about. Namely, we bitching about things.

So without further ado:

Rant 1- I saw a billbaord today that was attempting to resurrect an old 70's jingle. It read, "Baseball, hotdogs, apple pie, and Chevrolet" and underneath in smaller print "Toyota is sumo and sushi". I suppose that was their way of making it up to date. Here's the problem as I see it.

Baseball vs. Sumo. I'm gonna burn in hell for this, but I'd rather Sumo. Both sports are steeped in tradition and ritual. Sumo takes on even a religious element with it's ties to Shinto. The difference being Sumo is still governed with authority. The overarching emphasis is still on the purity and integrity of the sport. The last professional sport game that I watched completely was the Jazz vs. Bulls final part 2 in the 90's. Sports had already become about egos and personalities long before then, but since Stockton was still playing............

If a sumo wrestler gets out of line, they are cracked hard and fast. No appeals, no lawyers, no bullshit, and everybody KNOWS what is going to happen and why. Professional sports today? They should take Manny Ramirez and his ilk and ban their nasty, steroid-plumped, asses for life. No questions, no appeals, and permanent. Honestly, who watches it anyway. Where does the money come from. Screw 'em all.

(Get back on topic now). Advantage Toyota. As for apple pie, I love it. No doubt about it. The Japanese are either incapable or unwilling to make decent pastry. God Bless America and advantage Chevy.

Hot dogs vs. sushi. C'mon now. If I were at a ballpark and had the choice of a Chicago dog or a spicy tuna roll, my choice would be......neither. I don't eat meat. If my choice were oshinko roll vs. a 'veggie dog'. Advantage Toyota.

Overall analysis? Give me some rice and kimchee. I drive Korean baby!

Rant 2- Second up, is to let all my gentle reader(s) know a "Greek" restaurant to avoid. I don't even know the name of the place. I have the credit card receipt though. These guys are just north of the Harmon's in Roy. I love Greek food. Still do. But being a vegetarian, it has severely restricted my Greek options. I can have the lettuce/cucumber/pepperoncini/olive/feta/dressing concoctions. I can devour an entire tray of spanikopita. Which gets me thinking about how much I enjoyed working with Rob Holbeck back in the day. Dear Lord, the spread his wife Tonya put on for Christmas................yeah................ummmmmm...............Ahem. Let me think here........I can also eat vegetarian dolmathes, and Moussaka without the meat. I also love hummus. So I ordered some hummus today. The chick peas weren't even cooked thoroughly. What I got was a thick, lumpy mass that didn't even resemble hummus. Perhaps, I thought to myself, it still tastes good. I heaped some onto a piece of pita and dug in. I swallowed it successfully. Ate the lemon rice that I also ordered (say, isn't this supposed to have some trace of lemon taste?) and the remaining three quarters of pita. After promptly throwing the entire mound of hummus out in front of the guy at the counter, he asked how it was. I told him it was dreadful. He paused for a moment and said, "so you liked it?" No you f**king idot! Dreadful means something else. Total tab was over 9 bucks too. Which means I got reamed as bad as my wife did in her colonoscopy last week.

The bright side being, her colonoscopy was negative. We also enjoyed a wonderful meal with our neighbors Rob and Lorraine last Saturday at Mazza. I'm still thinking about it. Lotsa of yummy stuff there, and much of it vegetarian. I'll be back again and again!

Rant 3- I saw the headline and accompanying photo in todays paper. That idiot 30 something teacher that was boning a 13 year old boy was sentenced today. She got 10 years to life! I am still flabbergasted. Before I finish this rant allow me to divert to the fother side of this coin. Namely, the seminary teacher in Utah county that was dicking a sixteen year old girl. (By the way, if anyone reading this knows Dustin Moutsos let him know that they have an opening at Lone Peak H.S.) Anyway, this yutz had been getting it on with this girl for a while now. He was pulling her out of school for field trips. My reaction to hearing this story was one of revulsion. The girl will need support and counseling and will likely have added issues with future relationships. As for the guy? Well let's just say he's got a real pretty mouth. He'll be very popular in prison.

So back to the 13 year old boy and the late 30's teacher. He'll be fine. Just have his old man sit him down and teach him about what, with whom, and when these types of relations are to occur. It's a double standard to be sure. Still don't believe me? Women ask your men the following question (and guys be honest with your answer), "Would you have screwed this teacher when you were that age?" I got a good look at the one in the paper and my answer is no. The one from Florida a few years back that was doing the baseball team? Hell yes!

Thursday, June 4, 2009

Graduation day

over the last few weeks, just about everyone I know has been subjected to this annual event. I had not attended a high-school graduation since my brother-in-law's back in the mid-90's

Today was son number one's high school graduation. About the only positivie thing I have at this point is that the Bingham High orchestra is really quite good........for a high school orchestra anyway. It was the only thing that I wouldn't classify as painful anyway.

My mother said and did some things today that I was quite proud of. She made a stand for dignity and decorum. The party next to us was prepped and ready to whistle, hoot, and holler. The old guy had some kind of high-pitched dog whistle that he tooted. But the real champ of this bunch was the sister of one of the graduates shouting out. "We F**king love you!" .......twice.....at the top of her lungs. Nice! You can imagine dear old mom let them know.

Anyway, it took 1 hour and 35 minutes to start calling off names. Even that took 45 minutes. The valedictory speak was not overly nauseogenic. Still, it left me drained for the day. After the sun dips a bit, I'm going back into my garden.

All my lovely plants makes me feel good.

Saturday, April 25, 2009

indecison

many times I've had things I've thought I should get on her and discuss Today, I've nothing structured. No long diatribe. So, I'll just provide brief snippets.

I really should be gardening right now. I've got the new greenhouse, the seeds have been started too late because of the late snow and cold weather. It's been five days and nothing has even sprouted yet. I did manage to plant about 60 canes of raspberries and an almond tree last week and that's it. Today, I cannot even roto-till because it's too wet. Maybe tomorrow. Some people think that is working on the sabbath. I think that hoeing for an hour is as much work as playing the organ at church. At any rate, I've more than doubled the size of our garden for this year. In addition to feeding the bunnies, we will be eating lots of veggies and fresh herbs.

I understand that a lot of people are planting gardens now. It is reminiscent of the victory gardens in WWII. Of course, the precise reasons are a bit different. There isn't any rationing going on now. And let's be honest.........growing a garden doesn't save you that much money. Yes the vegetables are free, but the water, seeds, materials, equipment etc aren't. I grow what I use out of self-defense it seems. I tease people about 'organic' food because I despise the word organic. It literally means that it contains carbon. So does a pack of menthols!

I grow food because it is fresh, fast, and my bunnies love it. They love dandelions too. That is why I leave them in my lawn. In fact, I take great care not to uproot them in the spring when I pick them for my bunnies.

A few years back I went vegetarian for a few months but stopped. I started again about a week back. I didn't really have a reason then, I do now. I have been reading accounts and writings of various Presidents of the Church. And while none condemn the eating of meat, they would have it only rarely. The same thing with hunting, which they abhorred. Our scriptures say that meat is to be used sparingly and only in times of need. Somehow that has all been forgotten.

Here's my view. I feel that a cetain moral authority is required to eat meat. What does that mean? If you are appalled by, our think that the slaughter of animals is a task that is 'beneath' you then you have no right to eat meat. I know that we can't all go out there and slaughter a pig. It is also best that this process is done in central locations with efficiency, hygiene, and by people that know what they are doing. In a hypothetical world, if you would be unwilling to kill a pig and do everything that goes with it then you shouldn't eat pork. I've killed a pig, a deer, a dog, squirrels, snakes, rabbits, and fish and eaten them. (Eating the dog was an afterthought). After killing the deer, I immediately felt remorse. The rabbits took longer. During the winter months, I take timothy hay and lay it out along the roads where I've hunted rabbits in the past. Hopefully showing some kindness to their offspring will compensate for my past misdeeds. Killing just for sport is wrong. If you are going to eat the animal, not merely waste it, then one can justify it. Personally I cannot kill, or harm, scentient creatures any more. So I don't eat them.

Yet, I ate some scallops a few days ago. Why? I don't think that scallops, clams, mussels etc. are scentient. They do not sense their environment. They do not have eyes, ears, taste buds. They do not move, interact. They basically strain water for food, grow, and reproduce. They are basically armored mushrooms. So why don't I eat oysters?. They are oily and gritty. Even when I ate meat, I hated them.

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

presidential greatness, the war on drugs, and Carl's Jr. chili dogs

I was reading an editorial by Thomas Friedman today. The gist of it being that every great president has overcome a large challenge. With the economic woes we are having, he asserts that Obama will have his shot at greatness. Of course, he can also be vilified I suppose.

Being a Taoist, I have to read such things and dismiss this as foolish. Allow me paraphrase and 'modernize' a parable that I've read. A prominent, physician, a cardiothoracic surgeon at a major teaching hospital, performed a pioneering procedure that saved the life of a critically ill patient. It was a marathon effort involing a large team of medical professionals and took the better part of a day. Soon thereafter, the governor of the state he lived in heard of his exploits. A special day was declared in the legislature. The lawmakers wished to send large amounts of money to continue his work. Finally an elaborate dinner ceremony with the good doctor as the guest of honor was arranged. The doctor not only declined the dinner ceremony, but asked that it be cancelled. He did ask to appear before the lawmakers to discuss what should happen with the money.

The day arrived for him to speak to the lawmakers. He explained that he was the youngest of three brothers. All of them were doctors. He explained how his middle brother was very good at diagnosing problems in patients while the problems were still small. He had prevented many people from becoming very sick. As such, he was only known as one the better physicians in his county. His oldest brother was able to diagnose problems before they even happened (i.e. preventative medicine) and had prevented an equal number of people from ever getting sick. As such, he wasn't recognized as being any good. The younger brother explained that he was not the greatest physician, rather it was his oldest brother. That is where the money should go towards. Preventing things before they happen. Where the most benefit can be realized for the least amount of money.

So what is my point? When we ask for the greatest presidents we hear Lincoln, Washington, Roosevelt etc. Undeniably they presided over some of the darkest times in our country's history. My assertion is greatness is not necessarily found in overcoming mountains, but in stopping things and changing course while it is a molehill. The greatest President would therefore be one who presided over a calm, prosperous period devoid of strife, corruption, or international intrigue.

If Lincoln were "great" he would have been able to defuse Southern secession and put an end to slavery (as had the rest of the Western world at that time). If Lincoln were a "good" President he would have ended the war quickly to prevent the wholesale destruction of the South as well as a per capita casualty count that made all other wars this country has fought in look tame by comparison. Nope, Lincoln was a so-so President that gutted it out. I could make similar arguments against Washington and Roosevelt. The one major difference with Roosevelt being he inherited a huge damn economic mess from a Republican administration. Sound familiar? However, he should have started playing rough with the Fascists starting in '36 and '37. It's what a "great" president would have done.

I'm going to keep my comments about the war on drugs brief. Far all I know I might have discussed it earlier. Certain 'illegal' drugs need to be made legal or at least decriminalized. We as a nation need to have a rational examination about what drugs do and don't do. What is safe, what is not. What is safe to produce, distribute, etc. and what is not. What are the effects of long-term use? Casual use? Heavy use? And have it done by scientists that are armed with data. What we have is elected officials that still believe that only black jazz musicians smoke marijuana and that hippies are jumping off of cliffs, believing they can fly, after taking LSD. After they work themselves into a puritanical frenzy they go home and take some Xanax.

Ask yourself, what is more dangerous alcohol or marijuana? Before you answer, look up the LD50's on each.

People throughout history have always wanted to get high. Criminalizing it is new to the last 100 years or so. We have spent untold billions on the war on drugs. We've lost.

Finally, CJ's chili dogs. In a word........"DON"T".

Monday, March 2, 2009

Motivational Phrases

So I'm eating a can of Beefaroni this morning and reading yesterday's paper. On the cover of Parade is Liza Minelli. The combination of Beefaroni and Liza Minelli should have been enough to have me going for some more of the same promethazine I took last Friday (see previous blog). But since I am a glutton for punishment, I found the article and started reading. I got one sentence in and had had enough.

It started something to the effect, "If you got one foot in yesterday and one foot in tomorrow, you aren't living for today". Nice sentiment Liza. I suppose that gives validation to those of your ilk that are impulsive and do whatever they feel like doing today with no regard for tomorrow.......or the past. But I'm going to stick with you analogy Liza. If one of my legs is in yesterday and one is in tomorrow that leaves my 'third leg' in today. That's exactly how I should think. Of course with your picture staring back at me it's pretty much impossible.

There's a whole slew of motivational phrases out there, many of them contradictory or just plain stupid. There is a company called 'Despair' that has a line of products that spoofs just such phrases. I have had calendars from them for the past three years. Check out their website at despair.com and I think you'll agree.

Ms. Minelli's little acorn of wisdom notwithstanding, the phrase I most loathe is "It's better to aim for the stars and miss, than aim for the mud and hit it". There's one thing I find wrong and even offensive about this one. Those of us who have more realistic goals bristle at the notion that they are aiming for the mud. Perhaps we could have NASA retool this phrase. You have to have sub-orbital missions, then orbital, before you attempt the moon. Why, because it is highly unlikely you will make the moon in one shot and billions will be wasted and the lives of the crew will be sacrificed. Of course, people that adhere to the always shoot for the stars philosophy probably wouldn't understand what I just wrote. So keep aiming for the starts children!

As a reference back to the previous blog. Apparently the last part of "The Wrestler" features Mickey Rourke going up against his former arch-nemesis called "The Ayotollah". In the movie he was a guy named Bob who owned a car dealership in Arizona. The reason I dredged this up again, is because there are some Hollywood types visiting Iran this week. And the Iranian government used it as an opportunity to rail against the portrayal of Iranians in movies. They didn't like the stereotypes in "the Wrestler". I suppose someone hadn't explained professional wrestling to these morons. It is a passion play FOR morons. It is about nothing but sterotypes. And this Bob guy probably wasn't named Rafsanjani.

The Iranian government also objected to Persian portrayal in the movie '300'. The Greeks were pious family men, while the Persians were oversexed degenerates. (The few Greeks and Persians I know are all relatively pious family men and women. Including one of the single pharmacists I work with that should try a little sexual debauchery before he marries). Fair enough I suppose, except this happened over 2000 years ago. It would be like me objecting to the portrayal of the Swiss in 'Gladiator'. My Aunt Babetta, if she were still alive, would correctly point out that those filthy barbarians were either Germans or Austrians. Not Swiss.

Friday, February 27, 2009

Hand held movie cameras and public health

In my entire life I 've only walked out of three movies. The first was Oh God Book II. I don't really remember much about it, except it had an interminably cute ten-year old girl and George Burns wasting my time. The second was Showgirls. I don't really remember much about it either, except that one chick with the overbite and Gina Gershon were topless for much of the movie. In hindsight, I'm not so sure what made that such a bad thing. I just remember getting up and leaving. Today was my third movie.

Now before I say what this movie was, I want people to know that I actually watched most of "The Blair Witch Project" (the rest I listened too in the aisle). You see, I get nauseated fairly easy by the shaky camera techniques. It doesn't add realism......or grit.......or integrity........or anything else good. It just makes me sick to watch. Blair Witch was the first movie I recall watching with this camera use. It was also a truly dreadful movie. But my new champ is "The Wrestler".

I like movies about redemption. Characters that realize the futility, or destructiveness of the path they have followed, who realize that they must change. Of course, the protagonist had screwed things up so badly I doubt he was going to make it. Even if the cameras had been mounted on a tripod this movie would have still sucked. With still cameras, I would have been physically able to view it without having to reach for my bucket of popcorn so I could fill it with puke. I don't know whether the movie ended well, poorly, or ambiguously. By the time I got up and left, I was convinced it just wasn't going to end!

The nausea that I felt was so severe, that I came right home and took a 25 mg Promethazine. I've feeling much better now. There were two good things about that movie though and Marisa Tomei had both of them. She's like my age I think. NICE!!

On to topic number two. I got some mail today reminding me that my daughter (who will be entering 7th grade) will need her immunizations to be current. It just two nausea-fueled (thanks to the movie) tangential leaps to think about the people that get incensed about young girls being immunized with Gardisil starting at twelve or so. For those not in the know, Gardisil is a vaccine against HPV which causes a large amount of cervical cancer. Cervical cancer is a huge killer of young women worldwide. The vaccine makes a huge reduction in the incidence of cervical cancer. The people that developed it should have won the Nobel Prize for medicine. At the very least, I hope they are making gobs of money. They deserve it.

Anyway, I digress. The point I wished to make was that Gardisil has to be given BEFORE a woman becomse sexually active. There are those who bristle at the idea of the implication that girls as young as my daughter are sexually active. Infact, the thought of my daughter being sexually active is repugnant to me also. However, this isn't about morality, or propriety, or anything else but public health.

Are kids aren't supposed to start drinking until they are 21. Does that mean we should withhold any discussion about the dangers of excess alcohol consumption or drunk driving until they are 20? Of course not! Even the puritanical blowhards would have to agree with me on this one. So my advice to all those with young daughters is this. Get her immunized on time. If your feeling nauseated, come by the house. I've got a few extra promethazine.

One more thing. I don't want anybody in my presence to misuse the word nauseous. People always say I feel nauseous. Some people are I suppose, but most are nauseated not nauseous. For example: If I eat an unidentified mushroom and get very sick it is because I was POISONED by a POISONOUS mushroom. If I eat a rancid 7-11 burrito it is because I became NAUSEATED by a NAUSEOUS item of food. I might also say I was nauseated after seeing that nauseaous movie. That's about it for now.

Monday, February 16, 2009

Fat Tony and the Nobel Peace Prize

There is a movement afoot in our state to put limits on the interest rates charged by payday lenders. I think the entire industry is unsavory. I also think that regulations are not needed.

People fall into the trap of being stuck with these loans every payday and cannot get out. These people are fools and need protection. But will it help? I've often heard the quote, "you can't fool an honest man". You can draw your own conclusions about what type of people I think are getting trapped in these schemes.

Back in the day, Fat Tony would make you a loan for a week and you'd him back an extra 10% in two weeks. Of course, Check City won't send their goons out to break you legs when you don't pay. They have to go to court. Nobody dared rob Fat Tony, because they'd end up dead. Check City needs the glass, the safes, the security etc. and all that stuff costs money. The cost of providing this microcredit is large, hence the large interest rates.

I'd like to see these payday lenders, as they exist now, all go out of business. HOWEVER, the need for rapid microcredit is very real, very large, and ignored. Let's assume that my furnace went out today. Say that I'd need $500 bucks to fix it. I could cover it with checking. If not, I could use my credit card. Not everyone can do that though. I think credit cards are foolish. I keep one with a 500 dollar line for making online hotel reservations, car rentals, etc. that I won't use my debit card on for security purposes. I could go the bank tomorrow and fill out the paperwork. And in a few days I'd have my answer. It's only because I have a job, a home, and a decent credit score. What about everyone else.

We need to find ways for the Regular Joes to get access to small loans. One suggestion is to pretty much make these types of loans to women. Women don't squander money like men do. When they say I want to borrow 500 dollars for a used sewing machine and start-up supplies they will use it for that purpose. Another example could be $1200 for a greenhouse and some drip irrigation equipment to grow organic vegetables. This is the type of stuff that is being done routinely in some countries in an effort to ease poverty. I think it can be done here. Microindsutries are viable, expecially in agricultural products.