There is a place called 'El Parral' in Tremonton Utah. It is one of the very few Mexican restaurants where I truly clean my plate. The gentle reader is no doubt familiar with the obligatory shredded lettuce and chunks of tomato that litters the side of every plate of Mexican food. Nobody eats it. So why bother putting it there?
El Parral uses shredded cabbage and a bit of carrot and marinates it in salt (YUM). The chile verde is top notch. The chicken mole ain't too bad either. They're fast, friendly and affordable. I caught my oldest checking out the ass of the waitress. I suppose if I were 17 ..........well next topic.
The reason my entire family was in Tremonton today was for mother-in-law's funeral. Let me say up front that she was a kind, devoted, and decent woman. She loved all of my kids as grandchildren, not just the ones that were hers biologically. So on the outside chance that somebody from that part of the family stumbles across this blog, I must say that none of what I am about to say is specific to her on the family. It did get me thinking about some things is all.
Funeral food: As it turns out funeral potatoes and ham loaf aren't a Utah phenomena. Ask anyone that has lived in the midwest, especially Minnesota and the Dakotas. But, the startling uniformity of funeral food coupled with the metal folding chairs, and eating with a fair amount of people I don't know, prompted my visit to El Parral instead of the Tremonton 6th ward basketball court.
They call it compassionate service. I suppose it is. The people that show up and prepare the food, set up the tables/chairs etc. are doing it out of respect and perhaps love for the families involved. I'm not sure how my eating this slop fits into the grieving process though.
If they really wanted to have a meal that honored my mother-in-law they could have served the same food she served for family parties. There would be the roast beef that is something akin to the ham. Salty au-jus, thin-sliced, just pile it on a bun and eat it. But we also could have had her candied yams (YUM), her shrimp and macaroni salad (just take it easy on the green onion), and some greens besides iceberg lettuce with the Ranch dressing they sell at the local market. I despise Ranch......truly........but the stuff they sell ain't bad.
The second topic of Mormon culture I wish to mention is the blessing of children. For those who aren't familiar with this practice I'll briefly explain. According to the faith (LDS) that I belong to, there are several ordinances that are necessary. Things such as baptism would make sense to any Christian denomination. There is also 'confirmation', marriage, and a series of ordinances that occur in our temples. These are sometimes referred to as saving ordinances.
The point I wish to make is that blessing of children is NOT a saving ordinance, but it nonetheless a strong enough part of the culture that people outside the church would make the assumption that it is. There is some pragmatic parts of the whole process. The child, almost always a newborn, is given a name that they will be known by in Church records. The name is practically always the child's legal name. The child is thereby introduced to the congregation.
Stay with me know, I'm getting to my point. The second part of the blessing is the actual blessing which is supposed to be given as the 'spirit dictates'. In my life I have done three. All were over within 60 seconds. I gave all three children what I believed were meaningful, but succinct blessings. Which brings me finally to my point. The uniformity of what everyone else does.
They don't give the child a blessing. Instead they have a 'wish-list' as follows:
- strong mind and body
- example to your family
- baptized at eight
- receive the Priesthood starting at 12 (for males)
- serve a mission
- get married in the temple (hey weren't they supposed to go to college somewhere in there?)
- have your own kids
It is especially confused when you have grandfathers, uncles, brother, etc. doing the blessing. That means the father is either AWOL, a non-member, or a member that might as well not be.
I say they should mix things up a bit as follows:
- bless you not to end up a screw-up like one or both of your parents
- bless you with not getting knocked up (or doing the knocking up) early which the parents invariably did
- bless you with the infinite wisdom to listen to people that know what they are doing, unlike your parents or apparently your grandparents.
- bless you and your family with the wherewithal to get the f**k out of our basement apartment.
- bless you with a classic education with a hard science grounding and aheavy emphasis on writing.
That should about do it for me!
Remember go to the El Parral in Tremonton.
Wednesday, January 7, 2009
Wednesday, December 31, 2008
fighting totalitarianism, Obama, and the Boy Scouts
So my kid went and saw 'Valkyrie' starring Tom Cruise as General Claus v. Moonbeam errr Stauffenberg. It also features 'Priscilla queen of the desert' as one of the conspirators. Wow, maybe we could some of the guys from Braveheart!
I've not seen it nor have I any intention of doing so. I got burned on 'Enemy at the Gates'. It is one of the best war epice I've ever read, but the movie...........uggh. And what is my tangential association between the two? Well, much has been made between the purported resemblance between Cruise and Stauffenberg. I have to chuckle. BUT Jude Law (who was in Enemy at the Gates), could have an uglier brother in Stauffenberg.
Anyway, the story surrounds a group of German 'patriots' that try to kill Der Fuhrer before he leads Germany to ruin. Nice sentiment, but a load of crap. By summer 1944 (when this took place) the war was already over for the Germans. The Americans were hung up on unconditional surrender, and the Brits were largely obliged to do what we did at that point. But all of that meant nothing. The Soviet juggernaut had already been in full force since the Summer of 1943. All that remained to be determined was how far west the Soviets would get. Germany was already doomed. While it is true that the Americans beat the Japanese single-handedly, we were a secondary player in Europe. The Soviets inflicted 85% of all the military casualties that the Germans experienced. (The Americans covered the gap in civilian casualties with such niceties as the firebombing of Dresden). The American campaigns in North Africa, Italy, and finally France diverted how many German divisions from the Eastern Front. None.......yup nothing. During the siege of Leningrad alone, in the battle for just one city, they lost more people than the U.S. did during the entire war both in Europe and the Pacific. It is true that we sent the Soviets equipment, food, fuel, etc.through Murmansk and we paid a high price for it in ships and crews. But we were just helping the Soviets who did the vast majority of the fighting.
What was I supposed to be writing about? Oh yeah, fighting totalitarianism. The time to shut down Hitler was back in the late 30's. But since the German army was at most complicit, and at the least inactive, during Hitler's ascendance they are somewhat responsible. They all thought Hitler was just swell through the Fall of 1941 when they were unbeaten. The writing was already on the wall in 1937 and they failed to act.
There was a Soviet Field Marshall by the name of Mikhail Tukhachevsky that tried to do something about it in 1937. His plan was to use Polish and Czech ground troops supported by Soviets tanks, paratroopers, and air (the largest air force in the world at the time). He presented his case to Stalin and was purged and executed for his trouble. Perhaps he should have brought a bomb to one of the staff meetings with Uncle Joe?
Which leads me to Obama. There is a passage in the Tao te Ching that reads: "when the people no longer fear your power, it is a sign that a greater power is coming". Obviously this nation is still divided by race and class. Bush exploited it twice to get elected. It is a common tactic of psychological warfare to create inner dissent and mistrust. I see it a little different. This battle is not one of race, nor wealth (and the 'class' that is implied). It is a battle between those who wish this country to be strong again and those that are adrift and are too stupid to realize it.
Some people refer to it as a 'moral' center. I prefer the term 'ethical', since morality is so often defined by those with extreme positions. We need to return to principles of fairness, civility, and striving for a larger goal. Our nation was united during WWII. Both black and white united for a greater cause. Even the military desegregated long before the rest of society did.
There is not racism in the Army since everyone is the same color......green. (Of course the black-green guys always ended up cleaning the latrines while the white-green guys rested for about 30 years). I believe that Obama is the right man for this country. He embodies the American ideals of effort and struggle paying off. Of course, only time will tell.
And finally scouting. I read an article today that bemoans the fact that scouting has become a club for white middle-class suburbia and their push to include mor Hispanics. To all the 'Silver Beavers' out there I'll say this slowly and easy to comprehend words. Scouting is a waste of time. At least in what it has evolved into. It has tried too hard and too long to 'reach out' to 'include' that it has become diluted down and irrelevant.
Scouting was formed to improve the quality of military conscripts. What's wrong with that? Today's soldiers don't need to know twenty different knots perhaps, but the lessons to be learned in wilderness situations abound. There lessons in dealing with the elements. They can learn how to manage fatigue and hunger. There are lessons of reliance on everyone doing their job. There are opportunities for real leadership to EMERGE and not be assigned. Merit badges, skill awards, are a waste of time. Instead of garish patches for attendance at some bulls**t Jamborall (or an equally ridiculous Eagle project) we can have a small button that shows they completed a 50 mile hike through wilderness, or a winter camp which involved more than building snow huts in the parking lot.
Our scouts did just such a thing a few summers back. They went on a fifty mile loop that crossed the spine of the Uintas twice. I was not able to go with them when they did. I did hike in about 4 miles the last day and met up with them at their final camp. I knew that they would be in pretty tough shape by then and thought the worst. I also suspected that they were going to veer of the planned route and cut cross country to the final campsite. They didn't disappoint me. They emerged about 80 meters and 30 minutes late into a meadow I knew they would end up in. Some of them thought it was a miracle I knew. Nope, just good map skills and undertanding the nature of covering territory, especially when you are tired.
They were loud enough that I was able to shift my position such that I was hiding behind a tree and was able to jump out and say 'boo'. at the prceise moment they left the forest. (Perhaps a later blog will deal with how to avoid being ambushed). I was very pleased to see their line was tight and moving and there was no dissension or bickering. I suspect some real lessons had been learned. Of course, I gave them another lesson, the need for salty-ass food when on the trail. I ported in two grocery bags filled to the brim with Chips and Doritos. Within five minutes they had all been eaten. And I only had to yell at one dumb-ass to pick up the bags.
I've not seen it nor have I any intention of doing so. I got burned on 'Enemy at the Gates'. It is one of the best war epice I've ever read, but the movie...........uggh. And what is my tangential association between the two? Well, much has been made between the purported resemblance between Cruise and Stauffenberg. I have to chuckle. BUT Jude Law (who was in Enemy at the Gates), could have an uglier brother in Stauffenberg.
Anyway, the story surrounds a group of German 'patriots' that try to kill Der Fuhrer before he leads Germany to ruin. Nice sentiment, but a load of crap. By summer 1944 (when this took place) the war was already over for the Germans. The Americans were hung up on unconditional surrender, and the Brits were largely obliged to do what we did at that point. But all of that meant nothing. The Soviet juggernaut had already been in full force since the Summer of 1943. All that remained to be determined was how far west the Soviets would get. Germany was already doomed. While it is true that the Americans beat the Japanese single-handedly, we were a secondary player in Europe. The Soviets inflicted 85% of all the military casualties that the Germans experienced. (The Americans covered the gap in civilian casualties with such niceties as the firebombing of Dresden). The American campaigns in North Africa, Italy, and finally France diverted how many German divisions from the Eastern Front. None.......yup nothing. During the siege of Leningrad alone, in the battle for just one city, they lost more people than the U.S. did during the entire war both in Europe and the Pacific. It is true that we sent the Soviets equipment, food, fuel, etc.through Murmansk and we paid a high price for it in ships and crews. But we were just helping the Soviets who did the vast majority of the fighting.
What was I supposed to be writing about? Oh yeah, fighting totalitarianism. The time to shut down Hitler was back in the late 30's. But since the German army was at most complicit, and at the least inactive, during Hitler's ascendance they are somewhat responsible. They all thought Hitler was just swell through the Fall of 1941 when they were unbeaten. The writing was already on the wall in 1937 and they failed to act.
There was a Soviet Field Marshall by the name of Mikhail Tukhachevsky that tried to do something about it in 1937. His plan was to use Polish and Czech ground troops supported by Soviets tanks, paratroopers, and air (the largest air force in the world at the time). He presented his case to Stalin and was purged and executed for his trouble. Perhaps he should have brought a bomb to one of the staff meetings with Uncle Joe?
Which leads me to Obama. There is a passage in the Tao te Ching that reads: "when the people no longer fear your power, it is a sign that a greater power is coming". Obviously this nation is still divided by race and class. Bush exploited it twice to get elected. It is a common tactic of psychological warfare to create inner dissent and mistrust. I see it a little different. This battle is not one of race, nor wealth (and the 'class' that is implied). It is a battle between those who wish this country to be strong again and those that are adrift and are too stupid to realize it.
Some people refer to it as a 'moral' center. I prefer the term 'ethical', since morality is so often defined by those with extreme positions. We need to return to principles of fairness, civility, and striving for a larger goal. Our nation was united during WWII. Both black and white united for a greater cause. Even the military desegregated long before the rest of society did.
There is not racism in the Army since everyone is the same color......green. (Of course the black-green guys always ended up cleaning the latrines while the white-green guys rested for about 30 years). I believe that Obama is the right man for this country. He embodies the American ideals of effort and struggle paying off. Of course, only time will tell.
And finally scouting. I read an article today that bemoans the fact that scouting has become a club for white middle-class suburbia and their push to include mor Hispanics. To all the 'Silver Beavers' out there I'll say this slowly and easy to comprehend words. Scouting is a waste of time. At least in what it has evolved into. It has tried too hard and too long to 'reach out' to 'include' that it has become diluted down and irrelevant.
Scouting was formed to improve the quality of military conscripts. What's wrong with that? Today's soldiers don't need to know twenty different knots perhaps, but the lessons to be learned in wilderness situations abound. There lessons in dealing with the elements. They can learn how to manage fatigue and hunger. There are lessons of reliance on everyone doing their job. There are opportunities for real leadership to EMERGE and not be assigned. Merit badges, skill awards, are a waste of time. Instead of garish patches for attendance at some bulls**t Jamborall (or an equally ridiculous Eagle project) we can have a small button that shows they completed a 50 mile hike through wilderness, or a winter camp which involved more than building snow huts in the parking lot.
Our scouts did just such a thing a few summers back. They went on a fifty mile loop that crossed the spine of the Uintas twice. I was not able to go with them when they did. I did hike in about 4 miles the last day and met up with them at their final camp. I knew that they would be in pretty tough shape by then and thought the worst. I also suspected that they were going to veer of the planned route and cut cross country to the final campsite. They didn't disappoint me. They emerged about 80 meters and 30 minutes late into a meadow I knew they would end up in. Some of them thought it was a miracle I knew. Nope, just good map skills and undertanding the nature of covering territory, especially when you are tired.
They were loud enough that I was able to shift my position such that I was hiding behind a tree and was able to jump out and say 'boo'. at the prceise moment they left the forest. (Perhaps a later blog will deal with how to avoid being ambushed). I was very pleased to see their line was tight and moving and there was no dissension or bickering. I suspect some real lessons had been learned. Of course, I gave them another lesson, the need for salty-ass food when on the trail. I ported in two grocery bags filled to the brim with Chips and Doritos. Within five minutes they had all been eaten. And I only had to yell at one dumb-ass to pick up the bags.
Monday, December 29, 2008
I'm not the Angry Pharmacist
Really I'm not. Everybody should read his blog though. He used the phrase "a nebulizer treatment of 00 buckshot" in his last tirade. Poetry. Pure poetry.
I have tried very hard to avoid talking about customers and pharmacy work in general because I do not wish to be compared to nor accused of imitating TAP.
I had two absolute gems that came in today. The first wanted to get a few bottles of Fleet PhosphoSoda. This was withdrawn from US markets about a week back. Some docs are still not aware as well as most of the public. We've been doing a lot of explaining of options to patients that need the stuff. And so we explained it to this guy. He went off on a two minute tirade about why he had to have this product. When he was done I repeated that it has been withdrawn from the US markets and he just looked at me and finally asked, "so that means you won't sell me any?".
I hate to say customers are dumb. Many are confused, angry, sick, elderly (at least the ones with dementia), playing stupid, or flat out lying. But this guy.......wow!
The second wanted to pick up some prescriptions. I asked her for the patient's name. Her answer? "I don't know!" I thought perhaps she thought I asked her which medication (or perhaps in one of my pre-Alzheimer moments I actually did ask which drug), so I asked again "what is the patient's name" and she answered more stridently this time, "I DON"T KNOW". She made two phone calls and was eventually able to get an accurate DOB and a last name that was close, but not correct. Since it was for prenatal vitamins, I let it go.
Whew! I'll try not to rant about work again. This was just a perfect storm of absurdity. I kept waiting for Allan Funt to come around the corner but it didn't happen.
The suckiest part of the holidays are behind us now. I keep hearing the song in my head about "it's the most wonderful time of the year". Really?
"It's the most wonderful time of the year.....all the cutthroat are biting, the campgrounds are empty, makes me want to cheer.......it's the most wonderful time of the year". It's the first week of October. I can go for a day long hike and take a leak when I want to. Nobody on the trail to disturb my solitude. I also don't have to watch some doofus with a stringer of 12 inch planters that he took on powerbait. Maybe one day I'll catch a fish while taking a leak.
I have tried very hard to avoid talking about customers and pharmacy work in general because I do not wish to be compared to nor accused of imitating TAP.
I had two absolute gems that came in today. The first wanted to get a few bottles of Fleet PhosphoSoda. This was withdrawn from US markets about a week back. Some docs are still not aware as well as most of the public. We've been doing a lot of explaining of options to patients that need the stuff. And so we explained it to this guy. He went off on a two minute tirade about why he had to have this product. When he was done I repeated that it has been withdrawn from the US markets and he just looked at me and finally asked, "so that means you won't sell me any?".
I hate to say customers are dumb. Many are confused, angry, sick, elderly (at least the ones with dementia), playing stupid, or flat out lying. But this guy.......wow!
The second wanted to pick up some prescriptions. I asked her for the patient's name. Her answer? "I don't know!" I thought perhaps she thought I asked her which medication (or perhaps in one of my pre-Alzheimer moments I actually did ask which drug), so I asked again "what is the patient's name" and she answered more stridently this time, "I DON"T KNOW". She made two phone calls and was eventually able to get an accurate DOB and a last name that was close, but not correct. Since it was for prenatal vitamins, I let it go.
Whew! I'll try not to rant about work again. This was just a perfect storm of absurdity. I kept waiting for Allan Funt to come around the corner but it didn't happen.
The suckiest part of the holidays are behind us now. I keep hearing the song in my head about "it's the most wonderful time of the year". Really?
"It's the most wonderful time of the year.....all the cutthroat are biting, the campgrounds are empty, makes me want to cheer.......it's the most wonderful time of the year". It's the first week of October. I can go for a day long hike and take a leak when I want to. Nobody on the trail to disturb my solitude. I also don't have to watch some doofus with a stringer of 12 inch planters that he took on powerbait. Maybe one day I'll catch a fish while taking a leak.
Saturday, December 20, 2008
"The" Christmas spirit.......and Zac Efron
Well perhaps I should start with young Master Efron. I have always received particular joy from celebrities that have a good thing going (whether it be a TV show, writing a book, a singer etc.), and being consumed by their delusional importance of their 'art'. A classic example is Anthony Edwards. He is after all the real reason that people made 'Top Gun' a success. Then he was on 'ER'. He left and..............well it worked for Clooney didn't it?
Anyway.........I never watched even one episode of 'ER', but I do read the National Enquirer rather faithfully. So I follow the trajectory of human wreckage that is Hollywood and keep my pulse on pop culture. I also shake my head in amazement that Brad Pitt turned up his nose at Jennifer Aniston for a tattooed skank that Billy Bob Thornton had left for being just too damn weird. But I digress.
I listened to about 3 minutes of the 'High School Musical' soundtrack. Now I understand why Mr. Efron is so very desperate to so something new.
On to the Christmas Spirit. This time of year is filled with the teary-eyed recountings of tales about finding THE true meaning of Christmas. I actually think some of the stuff that South Park does captures the meaning for 10 year olds when Cartman sings about it being a time of Christmas trees and pies and Jesus being born and so he gets presents. Again..... I digress.
Christmas is a time of giving and caring and reaching out to our fellow man. Right? Sure I suppose. January is colder and the bills come due though. Excuse me if I am a bit of a grump, but I'm not going to put any special emphasis on the three week period that we are in. I'm going to try and be a bit more vigilant for people, and especially family and friends, for the other 51 weeks.
I like parties where people can relax, enjoy some good food, and enjoy reconnecting and each others company. I despise gift giving between those of us that have stuff. On the other hand, helping out others that ain't got stuff can be sublime.
I guess my whole rambling diatribe can be brought back on track and simply condensed as follows. There is no "THE" Christmas spirit. It is an individual striving and realization, and one that hopefully persists year round. Certainly there were miracles surrounding the birth of Christ, but they of little significance when compared to the greatest miracle he brought about. Namely his dying for all of us. Perhaps we should give a shit next Easter beyond coloring eggs and eating lousy candy. We close down the country for Christmas......Easter is just another Sunday. And people say I'm screwed up!
Anyway.........I never watched even one episode of 'ER', but I do read the National Enquirer rather faithfully. So I follow the trajectory of human wreckage that is Hollywood and keep my pulse on pop culture. I also shake my head in amazement that Brad Pitt turned up his nose at Jennifer Aniston for a tattooed skank that Billy Bob Thornton had left for being just too damn weird. But I digress.
I listened to about 3 minutes of the 'High School Musical' soundtrack. Now I understand why Mr. Efron is so very desperate to so something new.
On to the Christmas Spirit. This time of year is filled with the teary-eyed recountings of tales about finding THE true meaning of Christmas. I actually think some of the stuff that South Park does captures the meaning for 10 year olds when Cartman sings about it being a time of Christmas trees and pies and Jesus being born and so he gets presents. Again..... I digress.
Christmas is a time of giving and caring and reaching out to our fellow man. Right? Sure I suppose. January is colder and the bills come due though. Excuse me if I am a bit of a grump, but I'm not going to put any special emphasis on the three week period that we are in. I'm going to try and be a bit more vigilant for people, and especially family and friends, for the other 51 weeks.
I like parties where people can relax, enjoy some good food, and enjoy reconnecting and each others company. I despise gift giving between those of us that have stuff. On the other hand, helping out others that ain't got stuff can be sublime.
I guess my whole rambling diatribe can be brought back on track and simply condensed as follows. There is no "THE" Christmas spirit. It is an individual striving and realization, and one that hopefully persists year round. Certainly there were miracles surrounding the birth of Christ, but they of little significance when compared to the greatest miracle he brought about. Namely his dying for all of us. Perhaps we should give a shit next Easter beyond coloring eggs and eating lousy candy. We close down the country for Christmas......Easter is just another Sunday. And people say I'm screwed up!
Friday, December 5, 2008
academia, soaking, and rumors
I'm proud of all my children. I hope everyone is proud of their own, even when they have not done anything extraordianry. This week son number one was named the Sterling Scholar in mathematics at his high school. The same ward I received in the 81-82 school year at mine.
There are some differences between our respective situations. High class is about double the size of mine. He was able to take all the math that is taught in high school. I wasn't. In my high school, they cancelled calculus because only 8 people signed up for it. That was really a chicken-shit thing to do. The same thing happened with AP Chemistry when I was a Junior. I was the only person to enroll. The teacher wanted to teach it too....even with one kid. I went to an inner-city school and I was denied opportunity. Now consider the case of people that are brought up poor and non-white. Draw you own conclusions.
My son got 5's on all his AP exams, and carries a 3.9-something GPA. He interviewed well and has very defined views as he enters the adult world. One thing he didn't get? A 36 on the math section of the ACT. I'll always have that to lord over him.
I went for a soak today at DFHS. When I was on my way out, about 1/4 of a mile from the trailhead, some goofus came running towards me down a steep section of trail. I turned towards the noise and moved off the trail instinctively. This guy had a mohawk, the gauged ears, and a coat over a naked torso. But what really caught my eye was the shiny metal object in his hand. I put my staff in defensive position in case he didn't slow down. I shifted to attack stance as he stopped. I doubt this kid realized how close he got to dying today. I am also gladthat I didn't kill someone for brandishing a harmonica. Yup.....a harmonica.
Finally, it appears that some of my coworkers have been reading my blog. I'm not exactly sure how they stumbled upon it though. This is more of an anonymous confessional or perhaps a chrolog of my descent into pre-Alzheimers. Anyway, let me tell you something about Ryan Ball. I shared a hotel room with him for a couple of nights in Vegas so I KNOW what I am about to write is true. He has this 'thing' for MEN's underwear. He'll go to stores and buy it. Then he'll take it home and put it on. After that he'll put clothes on top of it and go to work or other public places. Nobody has any idea that he's wearing men's underwear. You can imagine my shock to find this out. Surely, his wife must be aware of this. Perhaps she has even purchased men's underwear for him when he is either to busy.
There are some differences between our respective situations. High class is about double the size of mine. He was able to take all the math that is taught in high school. I wasn't. In my high school, they cancelled calculus because only 8 people signed up for it. That was really a chicken-shit thing to do. The same thing happened with AP Chemistry when I was a Junior. I was the only person to enroll. The teacher wanted to teach it too....even with one kid. I went to an inner-city school and I was denied opportunity. Now consider the case of people that are brought up poor and non-white. Draw you own conclusions.
My son got 5's on all his AP exams, and carries a 3.9-something GPA. He interviewed well and has very defined views as he enters the adult world. One thing he didn't get? A 36 on the math section of the ACT. I'll always have that to lord over him.
I went for a soak today at DFHS. When I was on my way out, about 1/4 of a mile from the trailhead, some goofus came running towards me down a steep section of trail. I turned towards the noise and moved off the trail instinctively. This guy had a mohawk, the gauged ears, and a coat over a naked torso. But what really caught my eye was the shiny metal object in his hand. I put my staff in defensive position in case he didn't slow down. I shifted to attack stance as he stopped. I doubt this kid realized how close he got to dying today. I am also gladthat I didn't kill someone for brandishing a harmonica. Yup.....a harmonica.
Finally, it appears that some of my coworkers have been reading my blog. I'm not exactly sure how they stumbled upon it though. This is more of an anonymous confessional or perhaps a chrolog of my descent into pre-Alzheimers. Anyway, let me tell you something about Ryan Ball. I shared a hotel room with him for a couple of nights in Vegas so I KNOW what I am about to write is true. He has this 'thing' for MEN's underwear. He'll go to stores and buy it. Then he'll take it home and put it on. After that he'll put clothes on top of it and go to work or other public places. Nobody has any idea that he's wearing men's underwear. You can imagine my shock to find this out. Surely, his wife must be aware of this. Perhaps she has even purchased men's underwear for him when he is either to busy.
Friday, November 28, 2008
the homeless
Today I saw a guy clutching a nice piece of cardboard that was carefully written upon with lettering that was consistently sized and spelled correctly. I gave him a dollar.
About 13 or 14 years back, I had some time to burn on the 4th of July. So I made up a sign. In smaller print on the edges of the sign I mentioned that I was NOT a Vietnam vet. I was employed currently and not looking to do any work that day. I had a home. And my health was good. In bold letters, centrally placed I put "NEED MONEY FOR BEER". I staked myself out on the Orem Center street exit of I-15 about a hundred feet from a guy that had his sign.......but really did need money for beer.
The most common thing was people would drive by without even looking at me. For hell's sake I'm holding a boldly lettered sign and waving. Feel free to draw any conclusions you wish.
The second most common response was rolling down the window and screaming things such as "Get a job you lazy bum!" I would point to the part of my sign that mentioned my employment status. It dind't seem to matter to them.
The third most common response was people dangling money outside of their windows. I would thank them naturally, but refused. I did request that they not give it to the guy downstream from me however.
Speaking of the guy downstream, he came up to me after about twenty minutes and told me to leave. I gently told him to go f**k himself and continued.
Over the course of two hours, I had tourist types take pictures with me. About three or four asked, "Aren't you my pharmacist?". And eventually the UHP did show up. The officer took my driver's license and issued a stern warning to me about how I was tresspassing (not true by the way), and didn't have the right to panhandle (also not true if I am not impeding traffic nor being aggressive) and how I was in a whole lot of trouble.
I suppose he ran my name for outstanding warrants or whatever the 'po-po' do. By the time he came back my name had changed to Mr. Loertscher. He asked if I was really a pharmacist and what I was doing. I explained how I had a few hours to burn before my mother-in-law's Fourth of July party and (since my sister-in-law was single) invited him to come. He had just started his shift and was working until after 10 pm so he declined.
And then I left.
About 13 or 14 years back, I had some time to burn on the 4th of July. So I made up a sign. In smaller print on the edges of the sign I mentioned that I was NOT a Vietnam vet. I was employed currently and not looking to do any work that day. I had a home. And my health was good. In bold letters, centrally placed I put "NEED MONEY FOR BEER". I staked myself out on the Orem Center street exit of I-15 about a hundred feet from a guy that had his sign.......but really did need money for beer.
The most common thing was people would drive by without even looking at me. For hell's sake I'm holding a boldly lettered sign and waving. Feel free to draw any conclusions you wish.
The second most common response was rolling down the window and screaming things such as "Get a job you lazy bum!" I would point to the part of my sign that mentioned my employment status. It dind't seem to matter to them.
The third most common response was people dangling money outside of their windows. I would thank them naturally, but refused. I did request that they not give it to the guy downstream from me however.
Speaking of the guy downstream, he came up to me after about twenty minutes and told me to leave. I gently told him to go f**k himself and continued.
Over the course of two hours, I had tourist types take pictures with me. About three or four asked, "Aren't you my pharmacist?". And eventually the UHP did show up. The officer took my driver's license and issued a stern warning to me about how I was tresspassing (not true by the way), and didn't have the right to panhandle (also not true if I am not impeding traffic nor being aggressive) and how I was in a whole lot of trouble.
I suppose he ran my name for outstanding warrants or whatever the 'po-po' do. By the time he came back my name had changed to Mr. Loertscher. He asked if I was really a pharmacist and what I was doing. I explained how I had a few hours to burn before my mother-in-law's Fourth of July party and (since my sister-in-law was single) invited him to come. He had just started his shift and was working until after 10 pm so he declined.
And then I left.
Saturday, November 22, 2008
latest DFHS
I went up last Saturday with my oldest kid. Never again. The parking lot was filled beyond capacity. People were parking on the shoulder of the access road. Scouts, youth groups, and the usual assortment of loud people.
All of the pools except the lower two (which are always in good shape) were murky and overrun.
I'll be heading back again before the snow shuts me down. I'm also going only on a WEEKDAY. I can clean out the Kokopellis and soak alone and in silence.
Something that I just want to mention briefly is the passing of my nephew Johnny. Our entire clan is crushed. I shall likely think of little else other than him my next time out. I would have liked to have shared such a place with him.
All of the pools except the lower two (which are always in good shape) were murky and overrun.
I'll be heading back again before the snow shuts me down. I'm also going only on a WEEKDAY. I can clean out the Kokopellis and soak alone and in silence.
Something that I just want to mention briefly is the passing of my nephew Johnny. Our entire clan is crushed. I shall likely think of little else other than him my next time out. I would have liked to have shared such a place with him.
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